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古典诗九期第二十二讲A组作业贴 |
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点评
这首诗起句用典,共工是水神,也有讲是恶神,用的可以,
承句江涌连天拍岸狂,涌,有点凑字江...
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点评
梧桐这首诗写的立意还行,只是欠文字表达功底
比如起句,倾字太凑韵,肆虐倾,怎么讲?谁也不懂,倾字要换,承句,警长鸣,省个钟字,虽讲问题不大,但别扭,刚才讲警长鸣别扭
接着看轷句,起承问题就这些,转
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