楼主: 蒲公英168
|
古典词二十二期创作班第十五讲舒荷组作业贴 |
点评
问好红苹果:此词格律,用韵皆无误,立意明确,脉络清晰,承接自然,遺憾的是下阙最后一句丢了三个字哈。还有“三两老朋干”,老朋干是什么?或者“朋”字是笔误。是白吧。努力哈
| ||
| ||
| ||
| ||
|Archiver|手机版|小黑屋|古典听风书院 ( 蜀ICP备15023305号-1 )
GMT+8, 2024-12-26 22:06 , Processed in 0.140625 second(s), 25 queries .
Powered by Discuz! X3.2 Licensed
© 2001-2013 Comsenz Inc.