| 
 
 4291| 62
 
 | 
古典诗十四期五律第三讲春组作业贴: | 
  | ||
  | ||
  | ||
  | ||
  | ||
  | ||
  | ||
 点评
粘该如何粘?转句粘错了。执手、回头两个动作不连贯。给人的感觉自然别扭。乌噪,给人是什么感觉?适合用来表达离别时的心情?血色伤?我很受伤。何由还是何时?…… 
 
 | ||
|Archiver|手机版|小黑屋|古典听风书院
( 蜀ICP备15023305号-1 )
GMT+8, 2025-11-4 12:05 , Processed in 0.406250 second(s), 23 queries .
Powered by Discuz! X3.2 Licensed
© 2001-2013 Comsenz Inc.