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词十五初级班第十三讲易安组作业贴,评阅老师:墨问5-20、小溪剩余楼层 |
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点评
问好学友,本词立意不错,上景下情,词作章法也不错。不足之处:1、造词谴句有待加强,上片的七言句与结拍不顺畅,下片的七言句为了凑韵竟用了一句面目狰的句子。2、上下片的结拍都不妥。加油
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