| 
 
 3471| 36
 
 | 
古典诗十四期五律第二十三讲春组作业贴: | 
  | ||
  | ||
  | ||
  | ||
  | ||
  | ||
 点评
一散人老师点评:意脉不畅,意散乱了 
 
 | ||
 点评
一散人老师点评:起后分句不通畅,起大气,后面虎头蛇尾了,给人意脉不畅。 
 
 | ||
 点评
一散人老师点评:颈联不对仗,结按道理景结非常好,凄凄这里谴词差点。 
 
 | ||
 点评
一散人老师点评:颔联颈联不对仗。 
 
 | ||
|Archiver|手机版|小黑屋|古典听风书院
( 蜀ICP备15023305号-1 )
GMT+8, 2025-11-4 10:53 , Processed in 0.433591 second(s), 23 queries .
Powered by Discuz! X3.2 Licensed
© 2001-2013 Comsenz Inc.