楼主: 世凡
|
古典十三期创作班浮槎组第三讲作业贴,评阅老师:锦色(单层)烟雨阁(双层) |
| ||
点评
问好如烟,看这年过得挺有味儿呢。词脉流畅,只是少了点蕴藉。再有上下片都用了酒,建议择一处修改。为你的流畅点赞!
| ||
| ||
| ||
| ||
| ||
|Archiver|手机版|小黑屋|古典听风书院 ( 蜀ICP备15023305号-1 )
GMT+8, 2024-12-26 00:48 , Processed in 0.141248 second(s), 19 queries .
Powered by Discuz! X3.2 Licensed
© 2001-2013 Comsenz Inc.