楼主: 蒲公英168
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古典词二十二期创作班第十五讲舒荷组作业贴 |
点评
问好红苹果:此词格律,用韵皆无误,立意明确,脉络清晰,承接自然,遺憾的是下阙最后一句丢了三个字哈。还有“三两老朋干”,老朋干是什么?或者“朋”字是笔误。是白吧。努力哈
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