楼主: 蒲公英168
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古典词二十二期初级班舒荷组第二讲作业贴 |
点评
脉脉清晰,立意明确,由望水。写相思,不错
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点评,春光,然后写桃花美,春光美,写桃花有点偏面
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1、写出思念的情结,句句不离主题。
2、留 字不协,改“流”为宜。空留,即是无泪也,
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