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古典词十八期青梅组创作班第十一讲作业贴 |
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老师您辛苦了
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点评
问好山道,历不断风波,这里没有领字,大堂歌,这里有特指吗?没有太口语化了,岁月又当梭还不如直接如梭,蔗境没看懂,整阙词遣词造句过于口语化,谋篇布局有待加强。
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